Ode to Pita Pit, the love of my life.

My new obsession is Pita Pit.  Why?  I don't know.  And, for those of you who do not know it is a chain that serves delicious pitas with any kinds of goodies  you want.  My friends and I recently discovered that they are open late night after the bar, and ever since then I have found myself unable to resist the temptation of a good ol' chicken caesar pita and a philly cheesesteak pita.. because no, you can't just eat one pita.

Usually I do not get too upset with myself for going to Pita Pit after the bar, because usually it is something that my friends and I do together.  (Everything is better when you do it with friends :) ) However the other night I found myself in an awful place.... alone at Pita Pit with two pitas in front of me.  Pretty sure me, and my buddy, Russ (the guy who works there), were the only people there at that hour and, yes now I do know him by first name.  I can only imagine being in Russ' shoes standing behind the counter watching me devour not one but two pitas by myself at a table that is meant to seat four.  Where are my friends?  Oh yeah, that's right!  They are at the bar because it is only 12:13.. and normal people do not ditch their friends at 12:13 to go to Pita Pit by themselves.

So now I have a new goal in mind for next weekend.  KELCIE YOU WILL NOT DITCH YOUR FRIENDS FOR FOOD! I think I am probably going to have to write it on my hand on Thursday just so I do not forget that it is just simply not acceptable.

My friend Leila had friends visiting this weekend and her poor friends probably think I am insane because instead of socializing at the bar like a normal person I was propped up against the wall, hair in my face dreaming about the various kinds of fillings I could get in my pita...
Pita Pit, why do are you so promiscuous and tempting??.. all those delicious fillings, and Russ, my boy, who is always there ready to serve..providing me with excellent food and also cigarettes for my lonely walk home. You really need to stop because I just can't say no.

So now I am thinking that maybe I shouldn't bring my credit card out anymore because then I will have no way to purchase Pita Pit at the end of the night.. but knowing me and my ridiculousness I would probably just end up begging and/or threatening someone so that they buy me a chicken caesar pita...oh pita pit.

E.W.I. - Eating While Intoxicated

Eating While Intoxicated or Eating Under the Influence.. Now there's a felony you have never heard of before.  But the fact of the matter is that it should be considered a felony for what it has done to my body and my wallet.  I wish I got arrested for Eating While Intoxicated because maybe then I would have learned my lesson and stopped cold turkey.  But unfortunately, the same thing happens every time my girl friends and I go out..

Before we start to drink at the house we discuss how we are NOT going to get food after the bar later on that night.  We are absolutely 100% positive that we will not eat.  We start giving each other high fives and shaking hands, and even taking a few shots to the fact that WE WILL NOT EAT..

So we go to the bar.. and we're dancin doing our thang... pickin up men with the moves referred to in my 2nd blog (how to pick up the man of your dreams).. until wait..what is this?? is my stomach growling?  oh no, i look around.. I wonder if anyone else is thinking the same thing I am thinking which is.. "NEED FOOD NOWWWW!!"  Instead of blurting out that I want to go to DP Dough and eat 5 calzones then go to Sliders I try to ease the fact that I am hungry, and maybe contemplating getting food, into the conversation..

"Wow guys my stomach is growling.. so weird considering I just ate an hour ago.. "
Hmm.. no real reaction.. okay so I figure I will wait and mention it like an hour later ..Maybe then they'll be down....

5 minutes later.. "So, who is feeling sliders later?  Anyone, anyone?"

*Looks of disgust*

Ok well that was a fail.. so I just give it some time and by giving it some time I mean casually slipping sliders into the conversation every 5 minutes.. "OMG guys I love this song.. It really reminds me of the philly cheesteak slider at SLIDERS"..."That is guy is so hott over there.. He looks like he would like a Buffalo Chicken Slider"...

Well my casual hints work because before we leave the bar we are all pumped for some good ol' burgers at Sliders.. we may even chant.. .. "SLIDERS SLIDERS SLIDERS..Everybody Now..SLIDERS"


Get to sliders..

Do you want to know how much I love Sliders when I am drunk?  One time I was in Sliders enjoying my philly cheesesteak slider when a guy came in and vomited on the floor.  Now if it were real life and not late night I would lose my appetite and run away.  But since I was in Sliders Heaven it did not phase me.. No..I picked up my slider walked right out that door and continued to enjoy it like nothing happened.. and I would do it again...so there.

There is only one thing I love more than Sliders when I am drunk .. (No, not men).. PULLED PORK.. yummmyyyy.  When I was in Florida there was "Pig Butts" .. a stand right outside our hotel filled with all kinds of barbequed goodies.  (I do not think it was actually called "Pig Butts" but there was a huge pig booty out the back of the truck... and because my friends and I are so clever we referred to it as "Pig Butts" or "Butt Pigs".  One late night we got Butt Pigs and it was fabulous.  The next morning I woke up to find something even more fabulous laying next to me.  Again, no it was not a gorgeous man, but instead it was a half eaten pulled pork sandwich......and that was the wildest night I had on spring break.. haha


Bottom line is food is awesome but should be taken away when you are too drunk.


And that's the way the cookie crumbles.. hmm speaking of cookies...

How to pick up the man of your dreams ;)

I want to start by detailing my recent adventures on Spring Break.  I had just broken up with my boyfriend of 3 years a week prior and was ready to hit the beaches and bars as a single gal...or so i thought... woooohhoooo  I just knew all the men would flock towards me...

hahah yeahh right....to my dismay they just weren't flocking.  Obviously they were intimidated by my good looks and sexy aura.  Clearly, all the men in Panama City were begging for me to approach them..

Since I am not like my sexy tan friend "Leila" who can walk into a bar and ask any man buy her a drink I have to be a little more creative with my ways to pick up men....


As soon as I walked in I spotted this hott guy across the bar.. tall dark handsome.. well not really tall but handsome.. i knew I just had to have him..and ofcourse he would want me because duh! im cool and funny and pretty average looking.  Should I be cool and approach him and strike up a little convo.. "hey where you from?" (even though I already knew.. Delaware).... well no that surely wouldn't work.   I know!  I'll stand across the bar and pretend I'm fishing for him!!  That will surely do the trick!  So there I stood.. in my drunken stooper.. waving and casting my imaginary fishing pole at this hott man across the bar....

Needless to say it failed!  I continued this a few.. 2 maybe 3 times til I realized this fish was just not gonna bite.. so I moved on to my next pick up line...I will creep stalk you and tell you how attractive you are....

And, when that didn't work I moved on to some more men and decided to hump them.. yess hump them.. as they walked past.... still fail. what is wrong with me?!?!?? Maybe i have been out of the game too long to understand what is socially acceptable and what is not.  Maybe i am too forward and maybe i should just let men come to me.  But, that's NO fun.  Shouldn't you go for what you want..even if he consistently runs away? "I will get you!" hahaha... we're not playing tag...although I apparently think we are..

That's another thing.. once 3 or 4 men turned down my sexy advances (reminder: fishing pole, hump) I decided that instead of going to home and calling it a night I would "text rape" my one guy friend. WHYYYY??? Because I can't handle being rejected from every guy in one night...

That reminds me of high school.. I tried to make out with my good friend Timmay before we were good friends and he denied me so then I decided to try to make out with one of my other guy friends (who wound up being my best friend's boyfriend later on in life, but thats besides the point.. what a twisted web..).  He was soooooooo NOT into it, but could I take no for an answer? Ofcourse not.  To me it was a game.. HE WILL WANT ME.. so I chased him around into my friends laundry room and pinned him up against the washer and kissed him.. hott.. I know. That's how I roll. And, after that he wound up being really into me.. atleast I think.. he may comment and say otherwise ha. what do ya think? you know who you are? ;)

So my question is.. how far is too far?  I am pretty sure that men like forward women, but am I taking it to a whole new level of forward?  Is it wrong for us women to go for what we want?  Why is there such a double standard??...

a little about me... because im awesome

welcome all (aka probably 2 maybe 3 of my friends) to my wonderful blog.. the way the cookie crumbles.   I decided to create a blog because of my supercool friends Leila (her blog name) .. and Joshheryyn.

My name is Kelcie... pronounced Kelsey not Kelis. Yes my milkshake does bring all the boyz to the yard, but I am far from the established (if you can call her established) music artist.  In my spare time I enjoy stalking people on facebook, watching criminal minds, and googling tattoo designs. yes, cool i know. 

I think now is the perfect time for me to start a blog.  I'm recently single and my entries will start by detailing my transition from couplestown to singleville.... quite the trip.  I think it is interesting and quite humorous for me recently entering the "single scene" in college.  Although I was single my freshman year of college, I honestly can not even remember it, and therefore I feel like a little baby chicken thrown to a pack of wolves (college men). ahhh! how do i act? what do i do? why do people play games? what games are we playing? i just cant keep up.. well read my blog and you'll see just how the cookie crumbles ;)